Saturday, September 8, 2007

$2.75 richer

We are all like little ants, dragging things into our homes one piece at a time. Unless we pay others to do it, then we are lazy ants, but still ants. I am no different and have already begun collecting items for my nest. Ignoring the car which I will argue is absolutely necessary for my environment and has nothing to do with impressing the female ants I have decided to live a minimalist lifestyle, at least until our game launches and we start pulling in some numbers.

I figure I need some basics, such as a desk so I can “work” at home, a bed so I can put the futon into the guest bedroom and eventually maybe a kitchen table and a couch. In addition I feel a washer and drier is a necessity and will save me money if I am here for more than 6 months. My budget for all of these items is $1000. At the urging of a good friend I drove to IKEA and for $70 found myself the most basic of tables.

I decided I despise IKEA. I located my desk within 10 minutes of entering the store, and then to my horror realized I was in a maze that would take the better part of an hour to navigate. The store is set up such that you must go past every display and through manipulation of space and time somehow backtrack to displays you have already seen but can never skip ahead.

IKEA doesn’t actually sell furniture. Only packages with the slim possibility of someday becoming furniture if you have the skill. My dad taught me long ago the value of doing things yourself; it’s about $5.50 an hour. Unless you’re a plumber or electrician or mechanic or have any other type of skill the lazy ant needs, in which case it’s closer to $150 an hour. The instructions that come with the random assortment of wood and nails don’t even have writing, only vague pictures that suggest what course you should follow to turn the junk they sold you into say a desk.
It was actually fairly easy. Within half an hour I had done a fine job of putting together a piece that very closely resembles a desk. Add 1 $8 folding chair from Target and we are in business. The corner closest to the window was quickly annexed by my cat, but there is still plenty of room for a monitor or two and keyboard.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I found myself unwittingly trapped in an IKEA maze once. I just started flailing my arms and walking through the cardboard furniture like the CoolAid man.

Slava Zatuchny said...

I was asked if the picture of the support call to IKEA was drawn by me. I assure you to my horror that is what greeted me on the first page of the instructions that came with the desk. The words are obviously mine by the rest is a photo.